webMD certified.

i suddenly completely regret my decision to write about everything that's happened to me over the past week, because now it's day eight and i'm finding myself completely void of any idea of what to talk about.

oh! here's something. did you guys know i'm a hypochondriac? yeah, that's a thing. but what do you expect when i grew up with a dad who's every sneeze was let out with the gusto of a gunshot wound and every cold was treated like the bubonic plague? (heeeey dad.)

between my hypochondriasis and my supernatural googling abilities i managed to predict my eventual (and professional i might add) diagnosis of chronologic urticaria that i received two years ago from the allergy specialist that comes down twice a year to st.george.

however strong of a case that first instance may make, being a hypochondriac isn't a good thing. i've had myself convinced on more than one occasion that i've had cancer of many different varieties. at one point i even diagnosed myself as lactose intolerant (thank the heavens that one was wrong).

it doesn't help that i am naturally blessed with many physical ailments, or self-diagnosed ailments, such as horrific heartburn (ooh alliteration. should i try and alliterate the reset of these ailments? yes i shall.), hypoglycemia (that whole alliteration thing didn't last long.), most recently anemia, a heart mummer, and extreme lethargia (alright, i made that last one up but don't i sleep more than anyone else you know? think about it).

being a naturally independent person, who has an insatiable love for googling things, it makes sense that i would become my own doctor, just as so many other internet veterans have. however, i'm going to go ahead and say that's a bad thing. anyone can post whatever theories or diagnosis they want on the internet and that ends up equating to the blind leading the blind. it's ok that i like to pretend i'm a certified webMD doctor, but when it comes to real medical problems sometimes it's best to just swallow your independent pride and book an appointment.

(in case you were wondering, this got all preachy at the end to serve as a pep talk for myself. however, if you ended up benefiting from my late night motivation, then we'll consider you a fortunate casualty. high fives all around.)