procrastination station: rainstorm pictures.

sometimes, instead of writing your paper, you edit the pictures from yesterday 's rainstorm which you also took instead of writing your paper. 

while attempting to capture the fury of the rainstorm outside i took a video. it wasn't until two minutes ago when i watched that video back that i realized there is a dude, just walking through the frantic rain. crazy, austrian. 

well... I’m going to go write a paper on something I haven’t even researched yet. but with this aggressive dubstep at my inspiration I am confident I will write something to move the masses.

"wub wub wub bbbbbuh tchya web web wub wub wuuuubbb SCREAM!"

it is complete. 

but for reals, that's what i'm going to go do now. 

(also, that part of me listening to dubstep was a joke... i would never... yeah.)

some things: tuesday addition.

here are some things (i figured i haven't done this in a while, so i thought it was time to do it again. also i'm procrastinating):
i need a hair cut so badly that it's a very good thing i don't own a pair of scissors and that i'm not willing to buy any for the short while i have left, otherwise i definitely would have cut it myself by now. so instead i either pin my bangs back the second i wake up or spend the entire day pushing them out of my face like some lost emo girl who managed to escape '06 (or is that still a thing these days? i'm so out of the loop)

i have roughly 30-45 pages worth of papers to write in the next four weeks. ahhhhhh!
as a direct result of that crippling number, i have just cleaned my room. it hasn't looked this good since... my german midterm.

my brother comes home in one week. another ahhhh!

i finished a really good book today, and it's making me want to reread all the books i fell in love with a few years ago instead of reading what i'm being assigned. i realize that's not particularly interesting, but that's the sort of thing we specialize here in maria-land. you're welcome.

also, i feel the need to once again thank my mom for my kindle. i got one for christmas, something i'd never even considered asking for, but it's become such a life savor. i can't tell you how many times i've had to wait across town for my bus to make it's rounds on it's 15-30 minute route and instead of being forced to pull my hair out of boredom, i've been able to open my kindle and choose from 150 books to read. ooh technology, you have my heart.

speaking of buses... kinda... there was a man standing at my bus stop today who was just chillin with his pants around his ankles. just standing there. like that's a normal thing for a 60 year old man to be doing. and it was not normal. luckily he had the foresight to wear a long shirt today. which is so strange to me, because he didn't even have the whereabouts to pull his pants back up. no worries though, i used one of my few but highly coveted super powers, avoiding eye contact of any sort, to spare myself from viewing anything too awkward.

while you're here want to see some incredibly awkward pictures of me? okay!

why i let rakel take such pictures is beyond me. why i don't delete them... is a whole other question.

other things... oh, i only have a month left here. not that that's a HUGE FREAKING DEAL or anything. i'm aware we already went through this a few days ago but i'm still having a hard time wrapping my head around it. as i have my internal struggle between wishing that time would simultaneously hurry and stop, time is playing coy and pretending not to notice, moving on like nothing is wrong. oh time, you respecter of no man. i admire you for that.

lets end on a good note shall we? so, at least three times a week i go to bed around midnight and wake up before 8 AM. i knew when i moved over here that i would change and grow in ways that i couldn't even imagine, but i had no idea it was going to fix the unfixable. if you would have told me that i was going to have to move to europe to fix my sleep schedule i would have started harboring a severely dysfunctional circadian rhythm loooong ago.

so. it's been... a few hours. i should probably start on that paper, eh?
wah.

the procrastination station

some things that i thought of that aren't important. ready?

one of the things i admire most about myself is my ability to lose track of time like it's my job, which unfortunately it isn't. oh, that's not a good thing? i sat down on this couch at 10:30. it's now 2:00. how? yeah i have no idea.

i'm currently sick. it's been a weird sickness though. like i can feel that something is wrong with my head, my nose is stuffy and my throat seems to be angry, but at the same time it's not really bothering me. it's like i'm detached from the discomfort that comes with being sick. i don't know if this is making sense, to be honest it doesn't make sense to me either.

i think i might have to rename this blog the procrastination station because that seems to be the only time i write in it. because as far as i'm concerned productivity is completely a figment of my imagination.

i wonder if there's ever been anyone who's listened to katy perry's song firework and thought to themselves, "you know, i have felt like a plastic bag!" yeah. no.

i just finished my hoemwork that i'd been procrastinating. it took me four hours to finally do, and all of thirty minutes to complete. wow.

i purchased some obscenely red pants today, which weirdly enough was something i'd been looking into purchasing for a while now. and i can't wait to wear them in public. now i just have to find something to actually wear with them.

seriously guys, i'm so excited. 

*edit. i took a picture of the pants for you. you're welcome :)

sorry that was the best picture i could get under the circumstances. i think the smudges on the mirror really add to the outfit. 

some small things before bed.

some things:

*so, i'm slowly realizing i really miss playing volleyball. tonight at FHE a few of us stragglers decided to play a game and it just felt good. i haven't played a real game since my senior year of high school, at least 3 years ago. that is way too long. i'm making it my goal to scrape together a bunch of people who want to play with me a few times a month. yep, i just decided that.

*next month is national write a novel month, also known as nanowrimo. the goal of nanowrimos is to write a 50,000 word novel in only 30 days; which equals out to 1,667 words a day. one of my goals in life is to write a novel so every november has haunted me ever since i learned about nanowrimo. i attempted last year, but only got to like 5,000 words before i got overwhelmed with life and stopped. i really want to try again this year. i still have a few weeks to really pull my ideas together. i'm just afraid i won't be able to finish it, kinda like how my project 365 is currently tanking (i hang my head in shame). i highly doubt anyone would want me to post each day's writings on here, and even if they did i don't think i'd feel comfortable with that. any ideas on how to motivate myself? shanks.

*speaking of incomplete projects, i've noticed a pattern. each fall the amount of pictures i take drops to nearly zero. i can't believe how incredibly uninspired i become when the trees are no longer green and the sunsets are no longer rich and orange and late. actually, now that i say it like that it makes total sense. i guess i really am a summer girl.

*now that the sunshine has left for good, i am always cold. so today after doing my laundry (which i did for the first time in.... well... over a month. honestly, i have SO many clothes) i poured all my clean, hot clothes on my bed and just laid on them. it felt oh so good. i really need to invest in a space heater or something.

*my new favorite thing is helping people at kiddie kandids who i had previously sold glasses to at standard optical. i'm lying. it's awkward. although i'm pretty sure it's only awkward for me (because there's no way they remember me like i remember them) but that's all that matters, right? right.

oh! i just found out that my finalized art history paper actually isn't due until tomorrow. procrastinating is no longer needed, therefore i no longer need to write in here. so, i'm headed to bed. night.

alright one more thing (for some reason i don't like posting without some sort of visual.) i found this and decided it was written for me.

yes galileo, yes. 

procrastination casualties: art history paper number one.

so i'm supposed to be writing a 5-7 page essay on the greek sculpture "Locrian Pinax with a Goddess and a Boy Inside a Basket" from the first half of the 5th century B.C. that's due tomorrow.

yep, that's it right there. 

sounds thrilling, right? right. so of course, i'm writing a post. you're welcome, you and the-maria-who-is-going-to-be-up-until-three-am-finishing-this-i'm-so-sorry.

this week i've decided to be an adult and not miss any of my classes (no worries, mom. i haven't been missing any classes. at all. big smiles.). this is extremely difficult because i have an 8:30 am 2D design class. wanna know when i am the most creative? i can tell you it sure as heck isn't at eight freaking thirty in the morning. when i do make it to that class i've usually only snagged five hours of sleep, or less, so needless to say once i get there i need a massive wake-up slap in the face with a big side of an "attitude adjustment". today, on three and a half hours of sleep and two cookies for breakfast, i was in a particularly pleasant mood. (it's time i acknowledge the need a sarcastic font on this blog) we had an assignment due where we designed three separate monograms done in a business, wedding/flourished,and in our own creative fashion that we were critiquing in class. now, i've complained about this brilliant teacher before (he's the guy who thought my name was murry. and yes, it pains me to bring that up again.) and so today when he was supposed to be giving us "helpful" suggestions on how to make our monograms more concise and effective, i was a little put off when his suggestions were a little (or a lot) less than useful. by the time he was critiquing the fourth students work i was dumbfounded by the suggestions he was honestly trying to pass as "professor quality insights". naturally, i started writing taking notes of the most unhelpful critique suggestions he was giving out. are you ready for this? here we go, word for word.

-"i don't know what needs to be done but something's not right"
-"i might mess with it a little bit, but i don't know exactly how or something, i don't know, play around with it a little bit"
- (pointing to an obviously flawed and poorly executed design idea) "maybe just design this (motioning to the entire thing)... better.

i found myself sitting and staring at him with my mouth gaping open. his suggestions sounded like what would come out of my mouth if you stuck me in front of a white board full of scientific jargon and symbols explaining organic chemistry and asked me to critique it. completely amateur with zero insight, not something you'd expect to come from a university level professor. i'm pretty sure if i stood up on the spot i could think of loads more intelligent things to say about the projects, even in my current state of blind, tired anger.

anyway, on a related note: i've been slightly bitter and a little too complain-y lately. (as seen above and in the past few blog posts) and i kinda want to snap out of that. suggestions? pictures of kittens? anything?
maybe i'll start doing what a few other people do, dedicating a day to being thankful for things.
actually, i wanted to start a gratitude journal a while back and maybe this is just the excuse i need to get that done. alright, it's settled. i'll start doing that at least once a week.

wanna hear something else? so the other day i tried to remember all the dinners i'd made for myself over the past week and i couldn't think of a single meal. and then i realized i haven't been eating dinners. either i'm out and about where food is being served (crepe party on saturday night, anyone? ah it was SO good.) or i snack on stuff late enough at night that i don't quite get to that violent, empty pit feeling that my stomach usually sends my way once it starts eating itself. my most recent and favorite snack? ice. yes. i know i've already talked about my ice eating addiction but lately it's been substituting actual meals, which i really did not not see coming. but because of that guess who's lost another two pounds? the same girl who now has an even harder time keeper her pants from falling down. really though, that's five pounds this month in total. i'm now getting to the weight i was in high school, about five to six years ago. big smiles all around.

well, i've procrastinated my paper long enough, the Goddess and her boy in a basket are calling my name. it's time for me to go use my sparse english skills and uncanny word-vomit abilities in a productive way.

**paper update number one: it's now two hours after i posted this post aaand i've still yet to write a word of my essay. that is all.